Reflections

And yet, here it is again, another whole 6 or so months since I last posted. Of course the holidays came and went. I was so looking forward to alot of the family traditions I grew up with over the years, like baking cookies together, shopping trips and all of the hustle and bustle that goes with getting ready for one of the busiest times of the year. I will never forget the first time my mom and I were standing in a line outside at the mall on Black Friday, at 6 am, the sky pitch black, and I thought to myself "I must be out of my mind!". It is the things like that that will make me look back and laugh. And, as much as I wanted to be a part of these traditions with my family since moving back, it seems it was not meant to be. Little did I know that my time as a resident there would be short lived 9less than a year mind you!). As the world is suffering and declining on so many levels, many people are forced to do what they must to protect their legacies and well being. And that is exactly what my husband and I felt we had to do...our children are our everything and we are the only ones that can do what is best for them at this time. As hard as it was, we made the decision to head back out west. Economically speaking, we did much better here. But, it was such a moral conflict...do you choose money or comfort and safety as well as growth stability? I mean, there was no question that the schools and living environment were much better back in Pa where I grew up. I wanted my kids to have the best education and the best environment to grow up as young ladies. On the other hand, the almighty dollar went alot farther out west. I to this day am still conflicted about the decision, but what is done is now done...at least for the time being. I say never burn a bridge because you never know when you will have to come across it again...and so to this day my husband still keeps in contact with his former boss and office staff back there in Pa. He certainly left a lasting, positive impression there! On a sour note: my mom had a traumatic accident just before I left to move back west. This event has left her with the inability to function as she normally would. She is different now, much different than what I know and remember her as. Thankfully she didn't lose her life from this, but still she is different. I hope and pray that one day her struggles will be behind her and somehow normalcy will prevail...the normal that she knows and that I know and love.


The weather here in Las Vegas has been a little odd to say the least. The high winds tend to be annoying and frequent. The temperatures have been a little cooler at times but I'm sure we are about to hit a warming trend any day now. Then I will be wishing it was fall,w ith cooler weather and of course, Football!! Seriously though, time is going way to fast for my taste. In about a week we will be celebrating our youngest daughter tunring 2 years old! I can't bellieve it already. Sometimes it seems just like yesterday that I was cradling my newborn. Her striking eyes looking up at my with such innocence and truth. Today she is a little firecracker! Running around talking away, a little fiestiness to her step and the looks that she can give sometimes..oh my! She is definately a momma's girl though....every time I walk out of the room, no matter if I am leaving or just going to another part of the house, she calls out to me....Mommy? Mommy? and then immediately follows with "Love you". My little buddy. Mia is, well, Mia....she is back to old habits as far as sleeping in my bed. I told her that my bed was an awfully big bed for such a little girl. I tend to wonder if the fact that there were so many changes over the last year has affected her....so, for now, I give in and let her sleep there. We have decided to redecorate her room with things of her liking to hopefully make it a desireable place for her to want to be in and SLEEP in. But, I have to say, waking up to a smiling face with those beautiful blue eyes staring at you and saying "Good morning mommy" is a heart melter. Madison got registered to start kindergarten for fall of 2011. I have such mixed emotions about that...and im sure I am not the only one. It has partly to do with I cant believe how fast she has grown up to this age and part to do with I imagined her attending school back east where I was sure she would receive a good education. Out here, there is so much uncertainty, and with good reason....budget cuts, downsizing, overcrowded classrooms - the list goes on - I just don't want her to settle for less, or my other children for that matter when it comes time for them to go to school. I can only hope and pray that she will thrive despite any condition in the system.

So, for now, we will just enjoy the upcoming summer and try not to sweat our buns off, although I wouldn't mind a little less of that extra baggage if you know what I mean, lol! Hopefully you and your families are doing well. It is my sincerest wish that everyone will embrace the good things in life and not dwell on the less important things, and I hope that you all have security, as many people today are facing issues of how to exist in this world with what little they have been given or have left from what they once had. Take care of yourself and each other.